Usanga mu rukundo habamo amakosa amwe n’amwe, ashobora gukorwa n’umwe mu bakundana, yaba umukobwa cyangwa se umuhungu ariko ngo hari amwe mu makosa afatwa nk’atihanganirwa n’abakobwa mu rukundo kuko ngo atuma bumva babihiwe ndetse bamwe muri bo bakaba banafata umwanzuro wo kubivamo burundu, nk’uko tubikesha urubuga rwa internet lovepanky.com.

Ayo makosa reo ni aya akurikira:

1. Kunywa ugasinda igihe wasohokanye n’umukobwa w’inshuti  yawe

Iki ngo ni ikintu abakobwa bose banga ku basore , ngo kuko bimutera ipfunwe kugendana n’umuntu utazi icyatsi n’ururo, ugenda agwa, ndetse rimwe na rimwe akaba yanagira isoni zo kuvuga ko ari inshuti ye kuko ngo aba abona byamusebya cyangwa se bikamutesha agaciro mu bandi. Ibi ngo iyo bikunda kubaho umukobwa agezaho akabihirwa ndetse akagera aho ajya yanga ko musohokana kuko aba avuga ko nanone uri businde ukamutesha ibara. Rero ngo bishobora no kuba intandaro yo kuba yakwanga akisangira undi musore ushobora kwiyubaha akanamuhesha ishema barikumwe.

2. Kutagira ikinyabupfura no kurakazwa n’ubusa

Abakobwa cyangwa se igitsina gore muri rusange ntibakunda abasore batagira ikinyabupfura, bavuga nabi batajya bishima usanga igihe cyose ari abanyamushiha cyangwa se barakazwa n’utuntu utwo ari two twose.

Umukobwa aba ashaka umusore wubaha kandi akubaha n’abandi muri rusange. Uwo abaza ikintu akamusubiza neza, yishimye kandi ashyiramo n’urukundo ndetse yaba yanamukoreye ikosa akamubaza icyabimuteye yitonze ntaburakari abivugana. Niba umukobwa akubajije uko yambaye, uko yasokoje niba byamubereye , aba yifuza umusubiza neza yitonze kandi adahuragura ibigambo bipfuye.

3. Kureba ijisho ryiza undi mukobwa uri kumwe n’umukobwa w’inshuti  yawe

Umukobwa mukundana arakugenzura cyane iyo uhuye n’abandi bakobwa. Aba ashaka kureba uko wifata. Rero ngo iyo ugira ingeso yo kwerekana ko hari undi uri kwitaho ukamureba ijisho ryiza, ibi rwose ngo bishobora no kuba byasenya urukundo rwanyu kuko atangira kwivumbura no kugira umujinya ko umurutisha abandi ukagera n’aho ubimwereka muri kumwe.

4. Kubaza ariko ntutege amatwi ubusobanuro cyangwa igisubizo

Ngo mu gihe ubajije inshuti yawe ikintu runaka, aba ashaka ko umutega amatwi ukamwumva kandi umureba mu maso kuko bimwereka ko wamuhaye agaciro kandi ko wabimubajijee ubishaka, naho ngo iyo bitabaye ibyo umukobwa bishobora kumurakaza ndetse akanabonako umubaza ikintu uri kumukinisha.

5. Kwishimira umwe mu bakobwa b’inshuti ze birenze

Burya rwose ngo abakobwa baba bifuza kandi bakanakunda abasore baha agaciro bagenzi babo. Ariko ngo irinde kugira inshuti ye uganiriza birambuye cyangwa se ngo ugire icyo umubwira rwihishwa kuko ngo mu gihe abimenye abona ko uko kurengera gushobora no gutuma mu muca inyuma, ibi rero bigatuma atishima.

6. Kugereranya inshuti yawe n’abandi bakobwa

Mu gihe uri kumwe n’umukobwa w’inshuti yawe ugatangira kumugereranya n’abandi baba abo uzi bisanzwe cyangwa se abo mwigeze gukundana uvuga ibyo bamurusha nko kumubwira ko akwiriye kwambara nka runaka, ko kanaka mwakundanaga yambaraga neza kumurusha n’ibindi, ngo iri ni ikosa rikomeye cyane kuko yumva ko we afite agaciro gake imbere yawe bityo bikamutera uburakari ndetse no gukundana nawe akuva ntacyo bivuze cyane. 

7. Kutita ku nshuti yawe

Abakobwa bose bashimishwa n’uko abasore b’inshuti zabo babitaho ndetse bakanabyirata muri bagenzi babo. Rero ngo iyo mukundana ntumwiteho ngo umukorere ibyo abandi bakorerwa, rwose ngo ashobora no kwigendera atagusezeyeho kuko ngo kwitabwaho no guteteshwa ari byo byerekana aho atandukaniye n’abandi badafite inshuti.

Basore rero, ngira ngo mwumvise ko hari amakosa mushobora gukora akababuza amahirwe yo kurambana n’abo mukunda, ubwo rero niba hari ayo wakoraga utangire kuyakosora kugira ngo ugumane amahirwe yo gukunda no gukundwa.

Ifoto: lestheoriesdelise.com
MUSABYIMANA Rachel /UMUGANGA.com